Some points to think about...

 As people begin to get used to COVID precautions and things opening up, our clients have been getting less patient and understanding.  I am finding myself spending more time on the phone listening to people's frustrations of the current situation (some of which involve that I'm running late, which happens when I have to spend more time listening to frustrations on the phone), but I digress.

The nature of a veterinarian and what we do is different from the grocery store clerk, a school teacher or even a human doctor.

Animals don't talk, they can't communicate.  This seems basic, but is something that clients don't always realize have repercussions.  If I'm examining your pet,  I need to touch your pet all over.  As much as I would prefer to wear gloves, it is difficult for me to do a full and thorough exam with gloves.  If I'm looking for a tiny bump or change in texture, it's hard to feel through gloves.  In order to restrain an animal, even if it's friendly and just wants to jump and say Hi, someone has to hold that animal very close to their body.  Sometimes, pet owners instinctively want to jump in and comfort their animal.  We often find ourselves as veterinarians and technicians getting way more in each other's personal space than we would allow anyone else.  Those are risks we have to deal with.  As coworkers, we are a team and we work to protect each other.

Risks we shouldn't have to deal with are the large number of people who don't wear masks appropriately.  Yes, a mask is supposed to cover your nose.  No, masks with respirators don't do anything to protect me from you.  No, please don't remove your mask every time you talk to me.  My limited exposure to clients has taught me that I really can't take chances.  People when they are emotional, either about their pet or life in general, don't think clearly.  They often don't make good choices.  I am responsible for making good choices.  The moment I have to put my family and my health at greater risk because of others choices is the moment I need to change my behavior and decisions.

No, I don't think masks should be mandated and I'm not getting into politics.  I'm just asking that if I'm working with you or your pet, you respect the fact that I do not want to get within 6 feet of you.  I'm asking that we respect each other.  While we all have different comfort zones, we need to respect each other.  So while I can't mandate people to wear masks appropriately and I can't mandate people to make good choices, I can say, "I do not want you in a small, enclosed room with an unpredictable animal with you."  While that might seem rude, it is unfortunately the people who don't make good choices who dictate the choices the rest of us have to make.

So please, I know it's hard to be separated from your fur-babies and waiting in the car is a pain, but consider that we all have families too and we are just trying to do our best.

Lily Lolek: Future Saint

 Lily Lolek: Future Saint

 

I was excited to receive Katie Warner’s new book, Lily Lolek Future Saint.  The illustrations are playful and well-done and the storyline is even better.

 

It tells of a girl named Lily who “there was nothing that she wanted more than to love with her might and to burst with God’s joy…”. It then is a whimsical introduction to the charisms of the saints, describing their virtues that Lily wants to emulate.  She becomes disheartened when she is told she won’t be exactly like these saints.  A priest comes to dinner and shares with her that God loves her and doesn’t want people to be exactly like a previous saint, but like the saint God made her to be.  It talks about building a relationship with God and following the examples of the saints, not copying them.  A wonderful message!

 

Overall, my son and I enjoyed this book.  He was familiar with the saints mentioned, but I think this book would be a great way to also introduce children to new saints and do further investigation.  The message of the book overall was wonderful to share with my son.  I think we will enjoy this book in years to come.

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Vet School Series: Critical Care Humor

This is from my vet school series- bear in mind that I was a sleep-deprived student when you look at the grammar and sentence structure...

I am on my Emergency and Critical Care rotation, that is why I am posting at 3:44 in the morning.  

After a long day of death, tears, hard work, throw in some anal glands, vomiting and diarrhea and exposure to X-rays, some dog wrestling, Chihuahua lunging, etc.. I am exhausted.

  Let's just say here, we start our days with Ibuprofen.  I have mysterious bruises on my arms that I don't know where I acquired them from.   I think I've developed dyslexia and I might have a concussion from body-slamming a Great Dane (when I body slam, it does nothing except stop the dog).  Am I complaining?  No, I'm a vet student,  and in some sick and twisted way, I actually enjoy this!

The people I'm working with are fun.  Sure there's stress when you have a cat on dialysis, a dog that ate chocolate, one that ate oxycontin, a septic abdomen and by the way there's a woman who is paging you every 60 minutes to ask annoying questions that you legally aren't allowed to answer.  We actually all can recognize her by her voice.  Unfortunately, we don't have laws like 911 operators do and we have to drop whatever we are doing to answer the phone.  But then there's those bonding moments, where you don't care that you have blood or other substances you don't want me to elaborate on, on your shoes, face shirt.   You just see that burrito that the angel from heaven, your beloved classmate, brings to you.  Then, as you're presenting an emergency case to the lead doctor, throughout the night he is trying different aerodynamic engineering designs to see if he can get the air conditioner to nail someone across the room.  There's laughter, tears, there is blood and there is guts, but what makes up for all the sad news and death we deal with is when Fifi goes home and the owners want to give you a hug, or when that cat who has been looking like death warmed over has the will to live!  (This typically means they try biting).  There's nothing like a cat who decides they feel good enough to be pissed off.  By the way, I'm not sure what day of the week it is and my body's schedule is all screwed up.  S
o if there are any spelling errors or things don't make sense, I apologize.

Election craziness

This is a post I wrote before the election in 2016.  It still seems to be relevant today....

I vacillate between worry about the election and a complete, "I'm done" with it all.  There's uncertainty in everyone's future and if you listened to the news and political people you would think whoever gets elected in 11 days the world will possibly end.

I work in an area where many people have opposing viewpoints and I work with people who either agree or agree to disagree.  This is a good thing.  It reminds me the world will go on and most people are just as frustrated as I am by our choices and the hostility in our current political climate.  I also am reminded everyday of the dogs and cats I work with who have no clue as to the partisanship around them and just display loyalty and friendship.  I'm not suggesting we should send our politicians to the dogs, but it restores my memory of what life is like with simplicity and without partisanship.

This election does matter.  It's important that everyone votes and understands the consequences, but should you be getting anxious and worried consider doing the following:

1. Know that as faith-filled people, "Jesus I Trust In You," can lower your blood pressure and remind you, render on to Caesar what is Caesar's and to God what is God's.  Think what you will about either political leader, but either way, we aren't living in the time of Nero's Circus and the Roman Emperors.
2. Read a little about the Founding Fathers.  They may not have had e-mail, but their scandals and drama was every bit as scary as ours.  Even Alexander Hamilton had a rather racy sex scandal.  At least we don't do duels anymore.  This was also a time when we were still known as "The American Experiment".  At least with over 200 years worth of corrupt politicians, we know that our democracy has been through it before.
3. Consider turning off the TV and going for a walk.  Sometimes it's good to get outside, smell the fresh air, watch the autumn leaves and think of America as a simple idyllic land.
4. Drink some wine, or hot chocolate, or whatever warm (or cold) drink that makes you happy and be grateful for the little things.
5. Think about how we are blessed.  Sure, we have politicians who we wouldn't want our kids to look up to.  I'm grateful that I don't have to explain everything in the news to my son.  With liars and language that even my thirty-something self doesn't like it can get rough.  I listened to Francesca Battistelli's song, "This Is The Stuff" on my way home tonight.  If you haven't listened to it, give it a try.  It talks about losing your keys and all sorts of other stuff that is a regular occurrence in many people's busy lives.  It talks about, "this is the stuff that gets under my skin".  It also ultimately comes out with the message, "when I'm in the middle of this little mess it reminds me exactly how much I'm blessed."  Yes, no one wants to deal with all the politics right now.  November 8th (or November 9th if you are the other party, you know republicans and democrats vote on different days, right?  Just kidding...) can't come soon enough.  But we all need to remember, we are blessed to live in a country where we can vote, where both sexes and all ideologies vote and no matter all the dirty tricks and other tactics, we actually do live in a democracy.  Take advantage of it.  Vote and most importantly pray.  Pray for unity and peace.

Catholic At Home- A Review

I had the pleasure of viewing a new premium video series called Catholic At Home.

It is a series of fairly short (around 5 minutes) reflections, catechesis and information on,  "How God is calling us to Holiness through our families."  For a busy, active family, I think going through this series one day at a time is very doable.

It is professionally produced and has great images to illustrate points and short vignettes.  One of the best explanations I've heard of the Trinity in a while was distilled down to a very understandable level.

Parts of the series talk about how to pray, how to read sacred scriptures as a family.

Initially it seemed the presenter spoke very slow and deliberate.  I got used to it though, and realized in the cadence it gave me time to absorb and meditate.  Sometimes I think I need a change of pace to just not tone out the message, so this was initially a turn-off, but I
grew to appreciate the cadence the further I got into the material.

I enjoyed how this program was a mix of catechesis and practical applications such as how you can and should live a liturgical life at home as well as forgiveness in a family.  I look forward to viewing more of their material in the future.

I think overall this was a good series, and a great way to have many "mini-retreats" in this stay-at-home time.  It is a 21 day series and the price of $24.95 is fairly reasonable for the professional and well-done material.  This might also be a good gift idea for someone (a good idea for a small amount of date time for parents to watch together, or include in the gift giving time for someone to disappear with a cup of coffee for 5 minutes)

Not my proudest moment, but some lessons learned....

 A couple of weeks ago, my mom and I went to pray outside of an abortion clinic.  It had been a while since I had done this because there is no parking nearby where you aren't at risk of being towed.  My mom calculated that our walk was about a mile, though I don't think it was quite that bad.

It was a walk along a VERY busy road.  We made it to the area with other prayer warriors and prayed a rosary.  We then headed back to the car.  I had to run an errand next, so we went on to my next stop, where I realized I couldn't find my wallet.  I hoped and prayed that I was being absent-minded (like the day before when I had left my wallet at home when I was at the doctor's office).  I knew in my gut though, that the wallet was somewhere along the busy road.  I went through a series of emotions, frustration and anger with myself, questioning whether I'm starting to have cognitive dysfunction (my husband had tried to gently suggest this might be the case and then I reminded him I'm a working mother who has a lot of stuff going on and I'm pretty sure undiagnosed ADD).

I also questioned God.  Certainly not His existence, but His reasoning.  Seriously?  Seriously you are going to let me lose my wallet when I got up early on a Saturday morning to do something that is not popular in the area and I'm going to get chastised for?  Of all times to lose a wallet, when I'm trying to be charitable?  I changed my prayer and said, "ok, it happened, now what are you going to do?  I'm waiting for you to bring some good out of this...."  I then prayed to St. Anthony.  I then e-mailed all the people in our parish Respect For Life group to please pray for St. Anthony's intercession for me (and to see if anyone had happened to pick up a wallet).

I went back to the busy street and re-combed the area along with my mom.  No wallet.

I went home and decided I needed to eat lunch, because despair is better with food.  I resolved after eating to look up all the things I needed to cancel or get replaced.

I received a call from REI.  While that might not seem strange, it was strange.  I hadn't ordered anything.  I listened to the voicemail.  Apparently someone was trying to frantically get a hold of me because they had found my wallet.  I called REI and got redirected through a few confused people and got a hold of the customer service representative who had called.  She was excited!  "There's a woman who's trying to get a hold of you because she said you left your ENTIRE wallet, with like your whole life on the side of ____ road!".  "Yes, yes, you are awesome," I replied.  She then gave me the woman's contact info to get a hold of her.  She sounded very excited and pleased to make my day.

I contacted the Good Samaritan and picked up my wallet.  She had told me she didn't want to send it in the mail and she had tried to get a hold of me by contacting my bank but they only froze my card....  She saw my REI membership card and thought she'd give it a try.  I'm sure grateful she did.  She did what a lot of people wouldn't do.  Not that many people would steal a wallet, but to go through the extra work and brainpower to try to track me down.  She wouldn't accept a reward.  She just simply said, "I've been in your situation before, this is what you do."

I shared the story with my parish group to follow up.  I told them, yes.  I did find the wallet, and thank you for praying for the intercession of St. Anthony.  I thought of how the woman at REI got to be a hero today, in a time when people are stressed and quite frankly cranky to customer service representatives (and veterinarians).  I thought how the young mom who helped me got an opportunity to make a generous gesture and I thought of the opportunity of the parish group to come together in community for prayer (even as mundane as a lost wallet) and see a positive result.  I didn't understand why God had let me lose my wallet (from a zipped pocket, nonetheless).  But I'm quite confident He knows why and I'm reminded the next time I want to question His ways, I just need to pray for His Will.

Essential Worker.....

I write the following with great gratitude for the nurses, doctors, grocery store workers and those on the frontlines.  They are heroes.

I used to feel guilty about being called an essential worker....  I'm a healthcare worker (for animals).  So, not exactly on the frontlines.   But.. as I was talking to a colleague we still bear the responsibility of deciding whether we should go to work.  Going to work for us doesn't mean teleworking, it's just not possible.  Going to work for us means getting pretty up close to our fellow co-workers (as much as we would like to be able to examine an angry cat from 6 feet away, it just isn't feasible).  We have to daily make decisions on risk, our families, our livelihoods.

I've noticed that everything we do at work just takes longer.  People also seem to get angrier and frustrated easily.  A colleague remarked, "Side-effect of COVID whether you test positive or not- ability to become crazy and mad much quicker".  I've noticed people are sharing much more of their life stories.  Sometimes, it's very helpful to understanding what's going on with the pet.   Sometimes I just have to remind myself this might be that person's most meaningful interaction of the day.  While I'm not helping their pet directly, I may be helping them by patiently listening.

We also have to have empathy.  I have found myself and colleagues taking risks and being compassionate, walking a line between personal safety and compassion.  Euthanasia is a hard time in "normal" circumstances.  Try adding in a pandemic.  Different clinics have navigated this issue differently.  I kind of walk a line between personal safety and being compassionate.  We try to do things as we can outside (not possible with angry cats though).  Euthanasia by nature involves compassion.  People in mourning have difficulty keeping their masks on through tears.  They long for touch.  I was never big on hugging strangers, but I sometimes would touch a hand or arm to convey my empathy.  Gone are those days.

I've found that people are thirsting for community.  We are MADE to be in community.  This time is particularly hard for my single coworkers who don't have family in the area.  They have said if they didn't have this work, riskier than working at home as it is, they would go crazy.  They have admitted to going borderline crazy already.

Our retired priest at our parish wanted to fist bump people after the last Mass we went to.  While my son has been trained NOT TO TOUCH anything or anyone at this time, I turned to my son and said, "give him a fist bump, I have the hand sanitizer ready, but we need to give him a fist bump."  Different people have different requirements for physical connection.  Neuropsychology says that the power of touch is that it releases oxytocin (the bonding hormone) and that thus decreases cortisol.  

Decreasing cortisol helps our resilience.  Whether it's physical touch or trying to touch someone by listening, we have the ability to help each other be resilient at this time.

Everyone is walking and negotiating different aspects of their health at this time.  Whether it's preventing an infection or preserving mental health, we need the support of each other.  Whether it's listening, touching or reaching out. we all need to take care of each other.

In some ways, aren't we all essential workers?  We are all essential to each other.  Community is essential...

Strange Times for Everyone

The title of this post sounds cliche.  There isn't really a new "normal".  The word I seem to keep using with my husband is "sustainable".  Whether the decisions we make are sustainable.  When we were trying to keep the hospital admissions down in March and April, we were quite rigid.  We are adapting.

The initial precautions we took in March/April are not sustainable for the long-term for our family.  The uncertainties of work, the wish to sustain relationships, all of these things need to factor into the decisions we make, besides keeping our family healthy.  We are blesse

d that our family does not have anyone at extreme high risk of the disease, but we do have parents who are more at risk than we are.  We also know that they sometimes take less precautions than we do.

With our son, I see the role isolation has taken in his life.  As an only child (not by choice) he is forced to be with us all the time.  He is becoming more of anadult ahead of his time while at the same time becoming more engaged in video games (of the sports variety).  We used to not allow much digital time in our house, but the need to get work done, keep him occupied and realizing that he can't watch sports games on TV like he used to has changed how much we allow.  (I am sometimes shocked at all the old games he finds on the TV.  He will ask me if I was at a sporting event he's watching that happened in the early 2000's.)  My kid actually told me, "It's endemic to me that I have difficulty breathing if I don't have soda, games or dessert."  Yes, my 7 year old actually used the word endemic.

We are trying to balance learning, play and quiet time in a whole new way.  We used to never have TV or anything on during dinner time.  Dinner time was a time for us to connect.  I can't remember how it was exactly said, but our family realized that we really are together all day most of the time, so instead of forcing more conversation at dinner, we've started listening to audiobooks together.

Fortunately, we were able to go to my family's lake house for a brief respite, and there were boys his age there.  It was awe

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some.  It was like watching my kid become a kid again.  Interacting and socializing outside with his peers brought out a new joy.  Swimming, slip and slide, baseball and other lower risk activities were a great way to connect.  It reminded me that his childhood memories are not going to be like mine (I have no idea how he's going to remember this time period but I can only hope he will remember the good parts of all this "togetherness" and not the frustrations). 

 Even though his childhood will have a memory of a huge departure from "normal" and a lot of disruption, he will still have memories of childhood.  At this time, I don't think my role as a parent is to make life "normal" for my child.  I think my husband and I have the responsibility to walk in faith, find room for joy and not deny that there are some disappointments.  Jesus calls us to grow and these times are testing the soil we are planted on.  Everyone needs grace at this time and we are happy to find that in our Catholic faith.

Getting Back Into Church

As I'm sure many of you have experienced, watching Mass from home is missing a lot more than the Eucharist, (which is obviously the most important).  Spiritual communion, while helpful, is not the same as receiving the physical sacrament.

My husband and I tried to keep watching Mass at the same time on Sundays (and occasionally Saturday vigil) and we made a point out of changing out of our pajamas or casual clothes, putting the kitten away to stop his antics from distracting us and telling our son he had to pay attention during the Gospel reading and the consecration.  His difficulty paying attention to Mass at home made me worried that there would be quite a bit of regression when we got back into the pews.

My emotions and thoughts on missing Mass has vacillated from a deep longing and attraction to receiving the Eucharist (I convinced my husband to get up at 5 AM on our anniversary to make sure we could be one of the first 10 people to attend Daily Mass as that is where the limit was at the time), to feeling guilty that I somehow didn't have a deeper longing and need and despair as some people I know.  In some ways, it felt like life was still going on, despite the absence from the Sacraments.

This past week, we were able to go to Mass as a family for the first time in several months.  Though we were wearing masks, there was a lot of hand sanitizer and no missals, it felt like coming home.  My son, to my shock was impeccably behaved (although one thought I had was the loss of oxygen he had from wearing the mask may have helped, which he attested later to me that he couldn't breathe at times during Mass).

As a veterinarian, I've had to train myself to have extreme control of my emotions.  I probably only cry a couple of times a year (whereas a child, it was probably a couple times a week).  I hadn't cried the first time I had received the Eucharist on our anniversary, but on the first Sunday Mass together, after witnessing another woman cry, I did find myself fighting my emotions.  I received the gift of reassurance that yes, I did have a heart and yes, that heart longed for and needed Jesus.  While I was concerned that my ability to go on without the Sacraments had concerned me, what I didn't realize, until then, was how much spiritual communion did carry me through, how much the priests continuing to celebrate Mass, even without the Faithful physical present had a power to carry us.

Thank you, Lord.

The Big Book of Christians around the World Review

In a time when everyone needs to feel even more united than before, I was delighted to receive the book, “The Big Book of Christians around the World” by Sophie de Mullenheim and Solenne & Thomas.

My whole family enjoyed this book, from the age of 6 to 45, we each learned something new and different.  The book has 1-2 pages on each country with small paragraphs of facts, stories and more.  Each region has a “journal entry” written from the perspective of two children about something special that happens in that area.  While the book does a great job at highlighting unique practices in each country and region, it also does a fantastic job at showing how the Faith unites us all.  While the book says it’s “The Big Book of Christians,” I found that it was heavily focused on Catholics.  Obviously, I have no problem with that!  I did kind of think twice though about sending it to my non-Catholic Christian friends as it may be a little “too Catholic” for them.  I was happy to send it to some other families I know that share the faith and they were excited to receive it.  There was only one segment in the book that I found parental guidance was needed for.  There was a small paragraph about a robin hood type folk hero and I had a talk with my son that while giving to the poor is laudable, stealing is not Ok.  Otherwise, I found the values in the book to be part of our foundational beliefs and a great way to open all of our eyes to the beauty of our faith around the world.  Even though we are all different and may express our love for our faith differently, Jesus unites us.  What a great message for our times!



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Update

I'm sure I have a problem many people would love to have right now... I'm way busy!  What I thought would be a lull that would allow more time for projects around the house and spending more family time together with my husband has instead  become one where it seems like we are working multiple full-time jobs.  As one mom put it, "We are all in the same storm, but we are not all in the same boat.  Some of our boats have more people in them than others or are having to work from home, or having to work outside the home.  Some of us have additional stressors and some times there feels like a giant hole in the boat."  So true.

I had originally lost a lot of work at the beginning of this crisis, but now I'm getting a decent amount of it back.  Add on the change in situation where my husband is at home and my hours and flexibility have changed.  Moreover, my sister brought a great blessing to us in recruiting me to teach classes online, and I now have lesson planning and trying to fit in more and more classes.  (It originally was helping out with grocery money and now it has taken off and I kind of feel pressured into doing more because I keep getting requests to teach more classes.)

As my husband said, "It's not really like we are working from home, it's more like we are sleeping at the office."  Add on my husband and I trying to split task-mastering our son into his schoolwork (which he has a fair bit of) and I almost feel like homeschooling him would be easier than this online hybrid we are navigating.

At one point I also had to remind my husband that I'm used to having "pleasant" coworkers, so it would be appreciated if he could try to attempt to be friendly throughout the day.  He took my feedback and adjusted accordingly.

Navigating how we do things is also difficult.  I can't go into too many specifics, but I've had to draw lines for some people.  No, I'm not entering your car in a busy parking lot to see your pet.  No, I don't want to be in a small room with you when you just came from a hot spot area (apparently a lot of people are still traveling around the country).  Fortunately, I haven't seen any cases that have looked like coronavirus in pets, but it sounds like that may be something we need to keep our eyes out for.  It's a strange world and a strange time.  A lot of people are talking a lot more on the phone with me- even my son's specialist doctor who always rushes when we are in for appointments seemed thirsty for conversation.  He wanted to talk about wearing a bike helmet, COVID and more when we just wanted to hear from him whether my son's tonsils are ok (they are).

Hopefully I'll get back into blogging soon, but right now my family is busy praying and trying to hold it together.  In some ways it reminds me of initiation when I was on my varsity team in college.  It was something that involved spray painting from a river/bay.  As we were working on our "project" we realized that the boat we were in had a leak, at the same time a police officer above was alarmed by our noise and then looked down, "Oh, just spray-painting, carry on then."  He knew our graffiti was good-natured.
 Yep- we will all just carry on and when you have a hole in your boat, teamwork help gets you through.

Vet School Series: UP, obstetrics and Kalamazoo; living it up on the farm!

I can only write a quick email;

I am eating very well, lamb, lamb hot dogs, this isn't as strange as it might seem because we work with lambs all day (we just think of the really irritating ones that injured us or were reaaaally bad mothers); I've had much wrestling practice, and the comment was once made, if Jesus is our Shepherd, as sheep that means we are really stupid.  They can be very stupid, but also very loving and sweet.  I am developing muscles in places I didn't know existed.  I'm also developing skills in sprinting, wrestling and lunging, not to mention hurdling.

We get to do a lot of vet med, but also a lot of plain old framework (re-filling waters, rebedding hay, etc.. We've done more castrations than I care to remember, and now I feel like a mini pharmacy; we use about 2 drugs, a pain medication (I'm a big fan of this one) and an antibiotic.  We use garbage bags as our surgical field.  Okay, some interesting stories, certainly can't write 'em all up.  In the U.P. (for those of you not from Michigan, this is slang for Upper Peninsula, which could also mean "back woods") in the horizontal rain, about 12:00 AM; there are two of us outside, after a 17 hour day of wrangling, pulling lambs etc. there was another vet student and myself, she's about my size and we are alone.  We saw a light in the sky; a red light/glow like a city.  I said, "oh isn't that a pretty sight, it must be Sault Ste. Marie.  Then we see a light swinging around  and say, "maybe that's the lighthouse, that's cool" then when the woman came to do the midnight to 6 shift, we told her of our neat discovery; she laughs and says that's the maximum security prison about 3 miles away; but don't worry, the escaped prisoners wouldn't want to walk through the swamp.

Procedure-wise, I straightened out a dystocia which had 2 lambs trying to come out at the same time with their heads twisted and mom and the twins are doing fine : ). We have also tried to repair broken legs; done tons of bottle feeding (we now have lambs that think we are mom and call for us and follow us around); fixed a prolapsed uterus (uterus that was inside out) pulled and tried to fix multiple dystopias.  The prolapsed uterus called us to dig back into our minds for something about a wine bottle our professor told us.  We weren't sure if you were supposed to drink wine if you were fixing it, or the wine bottle was somehow involved in the fix.  Times like these inform you as to what you pay attention to in class...

We pulled and worked with many dystocia, humanely euthanized some animals and just made some more comfortable.  After I was trying to work out a difficult dystocia yesterday (Mother's Day), I got a whole new appreciation for natural childbirth; my first response after pulling my wrist and arm of what seemed like a high pressure chamber was, "wow, if that hurts my wrist, how must that feel for her."  I have a whole new appreciation for the crushing pressure and what our mom's went through for us.  Well, we've done a lot more, but I gotta go....meg

Approaching the Easter Season

I'm not sure who to attribute this to, but I think it is appropriate to share; let me know if you know who the author is:

The first Easter didn't happen at a church.  It happened outside an empty tomb, while all the disciples were sequestered in a home, grief stricken, and wondering what was going on.  So we're all going to be keeping things pretty Biblical this Easter.


Yep, this Lenten season has been different.  It has been challenging.  I relaxed some of my dietary restrictions I was going to give myself because having difficulty getting groceries was real.  Going dairy free and being restrictive when supplies are restrictive just was not what I felt called to do.  Having patience with our families, pets and all those around us, that was what I tried to focus more on.  Telling people who keep the groceries coming, "Thank you and you are essential."  Remembering the difference between needs and wants.  That was not what I had started my pre-Lenten journey wanting to focus on, but that's where I ended up.

Watching Tenebrae and Holy Thursday Mass online is just not the same.  As Catholics, we are "tactile" we need touch, smell, the incorporation of the senses.  Yes, there is a sorrow for what we are longing for, but in that, I can unite myself to the disciples.  The uncertainty, the sorrow, the anxiety.  I can unite myself with them in hope as well.  Without having to book a babysitter and the ability to "pause" services, I'm not spending half of the service trying to get my son to pay attention.  I have access through the internet to a Tenebrae service in Singapore and one in a beautiful cathedral in Chicago.  I can attend virtually a service at St. Patrick's cathedral and expose my son and family to more than I would be able to in normal circumstances with the realization that when the new "normal" returns, my whole family will have a greater appreciation for what we have missed.  While we can't experience the presence of the Eucharist in it's physical form, we may in the biblical- give thanks.

Let us all give thanks.  No matter if there's job loss, illness, financial woes or parental meltdowns that children are not going back to school this year, we all have the best thing to give thanks for- Jesus.

Have a Blessed Easter Season!

There are some silver linings...

The times have been changing for everyone.  We have all been forced to be adaptable.  We veterinarians are a fairly adaptable specimen, but we also like things the way we like them (like everybody).  The ongoing joke is that seeing pets, but not the people is every veterinarian's dream!

That's not quite true and I really do miss the one on one I get with pet owners.  It also makes certain aspects of my job downright difficult to impossible.  I can't demonstrate how to do things over the phone, I can't read body language or express empathy very well over the phone.  Everyone's going through challenges right now and even though veterinarians are considered essential workers and are fortunate enough to be able to work and get pay, there's stress for everyone.  There's the stress of small business owners, the stress of uncertainty and the stress of shortages.  We know that we share most of our equipment and supplies with human medicine.  We know that they are a greater priority than we are.  We also know that an important component of human health is the companionship and relationship they have with their pets.

There are worries that pets are going to suffer just like the rest of us.  Unfortunately, decisions such as, "I'm going to do everything I can to avoid the human hospitals," means that we are going to have a harder time treating animals who are riskier to handle, like anxious or mean dogs and cats.  We do the best we can, but our paradigm has changed.

To the silver lining... now, with so many people home, more people are adopting pets, older cats and dogs, and especially puppies are becoming new members of households, helping during this time of isolation.

People are just nicer now.  I'm sorry to say we aren't always that nice during normal times, but overall I've noticed everyone seems to be more patient and have more of a "can do" attitude.  Maybe it's because our expectations have been totally dropped.  I don't know.  Obviously I hope this pandemic goes away soon, but I hope the silver linings stay with us for a while.

Vet School Series- Gen Med and Fear

These are only a few tales; many I am forced to leave out for confidentiality reasons...

So I was giving my vaccine spiel to a woman who hadn't had a pet for 15 years, talking about the diseases that vaccines protected from, and misspoke, talking about the feline equivalent of canine distemper vaccine.  The woman looked at me with wide eyes and said, "there's a vaccine for bad behavior?  Why don't they have that in humans yet?"

Fear:

Our professor has a reputation for scaring everybody, to the point that grown men are nauseous and can't get to sleep at night and the consensus of the student body is that she's bi-polar.  As she's telling me we are going to meet up to go work at a shelter )and it's just me and her), the first thought that popped into my mind was, "yay though I walk through the valley of death, I shall fear no evil."  I turned to our ex-Army intern and shared this thought with him and asked, "Is this normal?"  He said not only was it normal, it was called for.  Later on, when we were at the shelter, looking at animals, we looked at the kittens first.  If you didn't know already, it's VERY hard to determine the sex of small kittens.  She asked me to sex a kitten.  I wasn't right of course.  Next we looked at a full grown dog.  I immediately said, "female" which was the right answer, but then looked at her face and terror came over me, it was a terror that one wouldn't even face on the witness stand if it was a mafia murder case, "well, maybe it's a boy, I don't know."  My face lights up cherry red and then I am told, "she is most definitely a female who recently had puppies."  Case closed.  Still haven't gotten my grade back on that rotation yet.



2020 Update- I did get a great grade in that class.  Apparently because we were all frightened of her most of us students were equally awkward.  She typically picked a student she didn't like and failed them, there didn't really seem to be rhyme or reason to it.  I said the St. Michael The Archangel prayer every day I went into clinics and I got a 3.5.

Tough Times, Yet Hope

All throughout the country, many people are struggling.  Many people are struggling with serious financial and health concerns.  I know my family has been fairly fortunate so far.  Yet often times our tough times are still tough, even though if we know compared to others it's not, because it's OUR tough times.

In a week of shortages, such as groceries that were ordered on Saturday for pick up on Thursday and got cancelled, to finding out people who offered reassuring promises of employment last week are now dropping commitments into July, and having to get by using bamboo toilet paper, I've had a tough time being a great mom.



I've lost my patience, or come very close to it.  Sometimes it feels like I'm living in a musical. My husband and son like to randomly break into song and it's not the best environment for focusing.  I've found myself wanting to work almost as much for my sanity as for finances.

This has been a time where I haven't had my proudest parenting moments, especially in trying to get my son to do his schoolwork.  I have three degrees and am trained to do life-saving procedures and chest taps.  I have not been trained how to get my 6 year old to focus when he does his math work.  I found myself in an argument with him the other day where he told me how he hates it and doesn't like it (I think the root cause is he's bored) and I explained even though he doesn't like it and doesn't think he has to do it, he does.  He gave me all the reasons he shouldn't and I told him fine, those are your reasons, but what do you have to say if I tell you it needs to be done so you can grow in virtue?  That ended that diatribe.  I think he realized there was no way he could argue with virtue.

Later on, my son's teacher on an online secular platform asked the students what their favorite holiday was.  I was interested to hear what my son would say.  When it was his turn, he said, "Easter!"  When the teacher asked why, "because Jesus rose from the dead and that’s the best thing ever!"

God shows us kids are resilient and even though I felt guilty for lamenting my problems with bamboo toilet paper and without my favorite foods I must at least be doing a couple things right and there is hope for us all.

Vet School Series- News From The North Woods

Well, all, I miss you very much for a multitude of reasons.  Here is some news from the North Woods... Read on if you would like ( it may be entertaining).

I hope to be able to attend First Friday!  I'm having a great time.  Ask Siobhan about the adventures of, "It's a Gurl Vet".  Cow tipping has become a frequent pastime of mine (only for medical purposes, of course).  Along with keeping my hands warm inside a cow and acquiring new freckles and what is to be the next line of facial treatment, "beauty a-la-guano".  I am contemplating writing my adventures up as "Meg Herriot".  No cell phone coverage here; learning to simplify; ironically, when I am on farm calls in Timbuktu, aka Leroy, Falmouth, McBain, Vogel Center, Manton and Lake City (some of these towns have stop signs!) and I have coverage, so if you try to all, you may catch me just as I am delivering kids (goat babies), calves, foals, doing a surgery and other details good company would not want to know about).  The people are all really nice.  There are a couple of characters.   I learned from one of them that hot dogs are a great idea for asking a girl for a first date.  Oh, and how can I forget my experience with an Amish farmer that left my head scratching.  We went out to to examine a cow at an Amish farm and the wife shouted, "Beware!  That's an electric fence!"

The other night, I heard some rustling outside of my window and the dogs barking.  The next morning a 45 pound bird feeder on a steel pole had been broken by a bear; who happened to run right outside my window.  (This was a confirmed bear, no matter how much I protested, "couldn't it have been a raccoon?).  At least all he chose to do was to snack on some bird seed.  Hope I didn't bore you too much, I miss you all!

My 18 year old self giving advice to my 40 year old self in the form of a prayer.

Lord,

Why do things seem so tough sometimes?

Why do we get thrown such curve balls?

Why, when we are looking for answers do we get nothing but more questions?

Why when things seem like they are going to clear up,

A cloud of fog descends.

Why do we get thrown everything at once?

Why do You choose the time You choose for everything to get confusing?

Lord,

I will not know the answers for a while,

If I ever know them, but perhaps...

Things seem so tough because we are looking at it from our point of view, our view that easy is always best.

Perhaps.

The fog is for reflection

Perhaps.

You only give us what we can handle

Perhaps.

It is not the timing of our challenges that matter, but our journey to address those challenges.

Perhaps.

Lord, you are so magnificent in all your ways that humans can not even fathom your wonders.

Your grace is so encompassing that instead of feeling frustration

All we need to feel is Your love.

That is also all encompassing.

Thank you, Lord,

For those gifts that I appreciate

And most importantly

For those gifts I do not know how to recognize.

Advice and Ramblings of a vet student survivor

1) Remember, you're NOT PERFECT, if you were, you wouldn't need to go to school.  One of my mantras, "Good judgement comes from experience and experience comes from bad judgement."  Always learn from your mistakes.

2)You're going to make mistakes, and when you do, especially when it involves a patient's health and well being, tell the professor.  They are kind of like priests with confession.  There is probably nothing they haven't heard or seen before.  You are not the only vet that makes mistakes, and most likely, yours is not the worst one.  Ultimately, if you speak with a resident/professor/staff, you will benefit.  Some ways of benefiting are more obvious than others.   You will learn from your mistakes, and not repeat them, learn humility (always a good thing in a professional student, especially a medical student) and your patient will be better off.

3) Grades are not everything.  The more you worry about your grades, I guarantee you, the worse your grade is going to be.  Sure, worry about passing, but not more than that.  The only grade that matters in life is the respect you have for yourself and the respect that your clients and colleagues have for you.  Some people are just not going to like you.  All you have to worry about is working hard, trying your best and always being an advocate for those who can't speak, particularly, your patients.  The rule I've used is, I'd rather be thrown out of vet school with self-respect than to feel like I sacrificed my character to pass (and believe me, I've seen that).

4) People are going to have bad days.  The majority of the faculty and staff are great, and well-meaning.  Some people have bad days.  Some, more than others.  Some have things so stuck up their rear that only a tractor could remove it.  For the former, be understanding and remember you have bad days too.  For the latter, feel sorry for them, pray for them, or laugh; there's nothing you can do about it so move forward.

5) A smile burns 6 calories!  Every time you smile against your will, it burns 6 calories.  The more you smile, the more it becomes a habit, and eventually, when you smile, it rubs off on yourself and others.

6) Remember where you came from.  Remember when you were a child, or when you finally decided to be a vet.  Remember thinking that being a vet was the best thing in the whole world.  Remember when you thought, "All I have to do is get into vet school," and then it was, "All I have to do is get into clinics," and then it became, "All I have to do is graduate."  Sometimes, getting in touch with the reason you got here, will give you a smile, and sometimes it will help you remember how lucky you are, and how hard you worked.

Things I'm grateful for in this strange time

I was telling my husband I think this current time is probably the longest and most severe disruption Americans have had to their every day life since World War II.  September 11th was pretty disruptive and there have been plenty of other events that have seemed disruptive as well (The Cuban Missile Crisis, etc.).  Food shortages.  Massive school closures.  Yep, pretty sure I didn't think that was in my future a couple of months ago.  The fact that my fortieth birthday celebrations are cancelled- well, that's a First World problem.  We are experiencing restrictions and changes that are bringing us a little closer to third world.

Of course I cancelled our Costco membership a couple of months ago, so a house that is normally so well-supplied in toilet paper that my son used to make castles with it is actually rather short.  Some other items are not as well supplied as they could be.  My husband and I took account of our pantry and found we have a fair supply of peanut butter, flour and sugar.  The following list is not listed in order of importance.  I'll start the list off with-

Things I'm grateful for:

1) Family- this is an obvious one
2) Peanut Butter and Jelly (or without) Sandwiches- it's going to be fun for my son because he actually doesn't get to eat these at school
3) Pets- the dog and cat are actually loving our home-bound situation, I think they think it's the best thing ever and the dog has gotten more walks in 3 days then he typically gets in a month
4) A kid who loves to be outside.  It reminds me that "social distancing" does not need to be cabin fever.  Hiking, outdoor Stations of The Cross, walks and our own family basketball tournament make things fun
5) The fact that I got a new computer before this all started...
6) We live in a time of technology that even with social distancing my son can do video chat with his classmates and we can FaceTime with our family
7) People who are understanding and choose kind
8) People with a sense of humor- we all need a little bit of that right now.  It's a serious situation, but we can always look for beauty and humor to help carry the load
9) Online shopping!
10) Lent- a penitential time period reminds us that there is eventually an Easter.  Celebration will come.
11) Great scientists and doctors and nurses and medical technicians and everyone in the medical community who are working hard to keep us safe
12) Disney Plus bringing FROZEN out early.  That was a nice surprise.  And let's just be grateful for streaming services in total
13) Digital books through the library- this is great!
14) Extra time to spend with the family.  Let's face it.  We are normally going, going, going.  We are forced to sit down and be with each other and just be present.  That's a gift.
15) Readjusting expectations.  Sometimes, when a lot of things/opportunities get taken away, you realize just how much you have and that needs are different than wants.

Feel free to add to this list and I'll add more as the time goes.

New series of posts...

Once a week,  I'm going to do "flashbacks" to some writing I had done when I was in veterinary school.  Some of the stories I've totally forgotten, some of the names I've forgotten, but there are a couple of them that still crack me up.

I'm happy that my son has an appreciation of "history".  He is enthralled with any biography he can get his hands on and he loves visiting places that have historical significance.  My husband and I have been successful at making him a nerd, just like us.

Whether it's the history of the world, the history of our country or the history of our family, my son wants to know.  I know this is a magical time when his curiosity is limitless.  He already has a strong dislike for homework (I remember I did too, it's tough when homework seems like busy work and is too easy for him).  I've compromised with him that I won't make him review his spelling words with me as long as he continues to ace his tests.  Trying to get him to sit down and do his mathwork is about as hard as getting him to brush his teeth.  It must be done though.

I'm happy that he has a profound interest in history though.  One of his favorite questions at dinner time is, "Can we please listen to American Catholic History?"  It's a great podcast that we've found that talks about less well-known people
and events in American Catholic history.  He loves stories.  Hopefully one day, he will love all the stories that I write on this blog and that will preserve his memory.  Now... if only I could make his math homework a story....

Marian Consecration for Children

I went through the St Louis de Montfort True Consecration To Mary about 12 years ago.  My husband and I journeyed together through 33 Days to Morning Glory by Fr. Michael Gaitley at the beginning of marriage and have subsequently renewed our vows.

It is safe to say that the first time I consecrated myself to Jesus through Mary, I didn't have a full realization of what I was doing.  The books and meditations were very helpful, but it can be conceptually difficult to understand.  Each renewal and spiritual journey that is taken has led my husband and I closer to Jesus, through Mary.

I wouldn't have thought it was very likely to explain this devotion to a child, especially a 6 year old.  I received a book by Carrie Gress called, Marian Consecration For Children: Bringing Mary to Life in Young Hearts and Minds.

This is a wonderfully written book.  I will admit that the first time I tried to read this book to my son, we lasted about 1 day.  He just wasn't ready for it at age 5 and I didn't want to push him.  We gave it a second try this past fall and he was ready for it.  So were my husband and I.  This was a great spiritual exercise for our family to travel on together.

Each day has a story, sometimes a saint story or a story regarding great literature, then some discussion questions (we rotated through this, mom, dad and child so everyone participated) a "Did You Know" and then prayer to finish the day.  Each day was less than a 10 minute obligation and we amazingly were consistent with our reading.  Our consistency I think was a fruit of our engagement in the book.

I highly recommend this book and think it is just as beneficial for adults as for kids who want to continue to grow their relationship with Christ through our Holy Mother.





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Coronavirus

I'll make this fairly short and sweet.

The phrase I'm hearing from the veterinary and public health community is, "Be kind and wash your hands."

Don't go crazy.

Don't get masks- I guarantee you from personal experience when you have a mask on your face you are way more likely to touch your face and contaminate yourself.

Have supplies on hand, but don't go crazy.  Be kind.  Don't buy the grocery store out of toilet paper.  It's not necessary.

Avoid handshakes, give people their distance.  This is where we start.  I have also heard from some well-placed sources that the administration is actually handling this situation better than they handled Ebola.  So that's reassuring.

YAY!

I've been without a functioning computer for approximately 3 months (I found out at the beginning of December that my computer could no longer access the internet, and what else can you do with a computer).  Anyways, I'm hoping to get back to my Tuesday/Friday blogposts, so help hold me to it!

Even getting this computer has been fraught with challenges.  I was having back issues, then I got the flu, then I got a sinus infection and so once I was finally feeling healthy I told my husband it was time to get the computer.

We ordered it and it has apparently been out for delivery since Saturday morning.  I was actually able to get a friend to pick up my son from school so I could stay home and make sure I was present to sign for my computer.  Hopefully this means my writing will become more regular again.  I also would like to start a "series" with some items I wrote when I was in vet school.  Some of them still make me laugh 14 years later.

The Island of Two Trees

The Island of Two Trees by Brian Kennelly is is not a book that I would have probably picked up on my own.  Up until reading "The Lord of The Rings" series when I was in college and then later C.S. Lewis, I had no interest in Science Fiction and Fantasy literature.  I'm still not really into it, thus why I wouldn't have picked up this book on my own.  I received this book to review and was open to it in that I knew it was from a good Catholic publisher and would hopefully not have any objectionable material to share with my son.

The first chapter was more interesting to my 6 year old than to me, but soon I was so engaged in the book with my son that as soon as I picked him up from school, all the both of us wanted to do was to read it and see what was up next.

This book exceeded my expectations in every way except one.  There were a few typos, which I was disappointed in, but the content, and engaging story line as well as the obviously Christian (and Catholic, but not "too" Catholic where our non-Catholic brothers and sisters would feel left out) material was great for building conversations with my son and exploring the battles between good and evil that continue to this day.

I loved a particular part in the book where the author used a hypothesis from the Garden of Gethsemane to explore how bitterness literally takes root and how even the smallest and weakest can play a large part in God's story.

This was a great book in that my son and I were both engaged and challenged together.  I sometimes have a hard time reading youth fiction because it just seems so predictable.  This book was possibly one of my favorite books I have read this year and it was great to share it with my son.  You know the sign of a good book when a child would rather listen to you read it than watch TV or play with their toys.  I am grateful for the unexpected opportunity to have read this book and I think many others from age 6 (a mature 6) and up would get a lot out of this book.

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Are Vets Real doctors?

I wouldn't think of saying this to my son's pediatrician, or to any medical professional.  Yet somehow veterinarians aren't always seen as medical professionals.  More than one M.D. has said to me, "I wanted to be a Vet, but I couldn't get into vet school."  Then a D.O told me, "is being a veterinarian an associates degree?"

A couple old jokes in the veterinary profession are, "Real Doctors treat more than one species," and "Veterinary Medicine- because Humans are gross!"  I actually got accepted into one of the top public health programs in the country, and that was my back up plan to Vet School.  They couldn't believe I would decline my admission.  But I did.  Veterinary school is actually one of the most expensive medical schools and let me tell you- when you get out, you don't get paid as much and you still need to purchase malpractice insurance.

Some clients understand the value of our education and I've had more than one ask me for medical or psychological advice (I decline and say that would be practicing without an appropriate license).  I've gotten into discussions with doctors, my own or relatives and have brought up valid medical concerns.  I try not to be "that vet," who thinks they know everything, but let's face it, I have to know about dog vs. cat and at one point cow, horse, sheep, turtle and chicken physiology.  Comparative biology is a thing.  I even participated in a shadowing program with a human MD and discovered how much is similar, and that cost is very much a limitation on how veterinarians practice, but almost not at all on how humans in an ER setting are treated.

Here's a recent exchange-

"What's this exam?  I don't want to pay for an exam, I just want the shots and test."

I calmly explained, "your dog is getting Rabies vaccine, by law that means it needs to be given by a veterinarian."

"Just what is this exam, what's involved?" She haughtily responded.

"The exam was what I did in front of you where I made sure your dog was healthy, I told you she was a good weight and I explained that you may want to start brushing her teeth, remember that?'  I calmly explained trying to keep my eyes from rolling back in my head.

"Well, I don't know why I need to pay for that."  She huffed.

"What you were paying for ma'am was my time.  The time I spent talking with you and the education that I went through that makes me a professional who is able to give your dog a rabies vaccine and interpret the results of the tests."  I could have added, "and now you should pay me for the extra time I've spent explaining to you that I'm a professional and my time is not free."

I never would have been so blunt a few years ago, but unfortunately this conversation, or the feelings behind this conversation are becoming more common.  My respect for other professions has grown through this time.  I understand why a plumber is a plumber and an electrician is an electrician. While youtube can help with some problems, it can't do everything.  When it comes to safety, there's no substitute.  That's why the government recognizes certain things, such as rabies vaccine as being specific to a professional.  It's not worth the risk of someone DIY off of youtube.

Exams before vaccines are necessary.  It used to be that veterinarians were able to charge less expensive exams because we would be compensated by the other items that were sold, such as food and medication.  Most people choose to purchase these online or from other sources, so we need to be able to charge a reasonable rate (way less than human doctors, by the way) for our time, our education and our continued education and sacrifices that make us competent professionals.  I have actually discovered serious, even life-threatening problems when animals have presented for "shots".  Please don't trivialize a profession’s value, either your doctor’s or your pets doctor.