Tough Times, Yet Hope

All throughout the country, many people are struggling.  Many people are struggling with serious financial and health concerns.  I know my family has been fairly fortunate so far.  Yet often times our tough times are still tough, even though if we know compared to others it's not, because it's OUR tough times.

In a week of shortages, such as groceries that were ordered on Saturday for pick up on Thursday and got cancelled, to finding out people who offered reassuring promises of employment last week are now dropping commitments into July, and having to get by using bamboo toilet paper, I've had a tough time being a great mom.



I've lost my patience, or come very close to it.  Sometimes it feels like I'm living in a musical. My husband and son like to randomly break into song and it's not the best environment for focusing.  I've found myself wanting to work almost as much for my sanity as for finances.

This has been a time where I haven't had my proudest parenting moments, especially in trying to get my son to do his schoolwork.  I have three degrees and am trained to do life-saving procedures and chest taps.  I have not been trained how to get my 6 year old to focus when he does his math work.  I found myself in an argument with him the other day where he told me how he hates it and doesn't like it (I think the root cause is he's bored) and I explained even though he doesn't like it and doesn't think he has to do it, he does.  He gave me all the reasons he shouldn't and I told him fine, those are your reasons, but what do you have to say if I tell you it needs to be done so you can grow in virtue?  That ended that diatribe.  I think he realized there was no way he could argue with virtue.

Later on, my son's teacher on an online secular platform asked the students what their favorite holiday was.  I was interested to hear what my son would say.  When it was his turn, he said, "Easter!"  When the teacher asked why, "because Jesus rose from the dead and that’s the best thing ever!"

God shows us kids are resilient and even though I felt guilty for lamenting my problems with bamboo toilet paper and without my favorite foods I must at least be doing a couple things right and there is hope for us all.

Vet School Series- News From The North Woods

Well, all, I miss you very much for a multitude of reasons.  Here is some news from the North Woods... Read on if you would like ( it may be entertaining).

I hope to be able to attend First Friday!  I'm having a great time.  Ask Siobhan about the adventures of, "It's a Gurl Vet".  Cow tipping has become a frequent pastime of mine (only for medical purposes, of course).  Along with keeping my hands warm inside a cow and acquiring new freckles and what is to be the next line of facial treatment, "beauty a-la-guano".  I am contemplating writing my adventures up as "Meg Herriot".  No cell phone coverage here; learning to simplify; ironically, when I am on farm calls in Timbuktu, aka Leroy, Falmouth, McBain, Vogel Center, Manton and Lake City (some of these towns have stop signs!) and I have coverage, so if you try to all, you may catch me just as I am delivering kids (goat babies), calves, foals, doing a surgery and other details good company would not want to know about).  The people are all really nice.  There are a couple of characters.   I learned from one of them that hot dogs are a great idea for asking a girl for a first date.  Oh, and how can I forget my experience with an Amish farmer that left my head scratching.  We went out to to examine a cow at an Amish farm and the wife shouted, "Beware!  That's an electric fence!"

The other night, I heard some rustling outside of my window and the dogs barking.  The next morning a 45 pound bird feeder on a steel pole had been broken by a bear; who happened to run right outside my window.  (This was a confirmed bear, no matter how much I protested, "couldn't it have been a raccoon?).  At least all he chose to do was to snack on some bird seed.  Hope I didn't bore you too much, I miss you all!

My 18 year old self giving advice to my 40 year old self in the form of a prayer.

Lord,

Why do things seem so tough sometimes?

Why do we get thrown such curve balls?

Why, when we are looking for answers do we get nothing but more questions?

Why when things seem like they are going to clear up,

A cloud of fog descends.

Why do we get thrown everything at once?

Why do You choose the time You choose for everything to get confusing?

Lord,

I will not know the answers for a while,

If I ever know them, but perhaps...

Things seem so tough because we are looking at it from our point of view, our view that easy is always best.

Perhaps.

The fog is for reflection

Perhaps.

You only give us what we can handle

Perhaps.

It is not the timing of our challenges that matter, but our journey to address those challenges.

Perhaps.

Lord, you are so magnificent in all your ways that humans can not even fathom your wonders.

Your grace is so encompassing that instead of feeling frustration

All we need to feel is Your love.

That is also all encompassing.

Thank you, Lord,

For those gifts that I appreciate

And most importantly

For those gifts I do not know how to recognize.

Advice and Ramblings of a vet student survivor

1) Remember, you're NOT PERFECT, if you were, you wouldn't need to go to school.  One of my mantras, "Good judgement comes from experience and experience comes from bad judgement."  Always learn from your mistakes.

2)You're going to make mistakes, and when you do, especially when it involves a patient's health and well being, tell the professor.  They are kind of like priests with confession.  There is probably nothing they haven't heard or seen before.  You are not the only vet that makes mistakes, and most likely, yours is not the worst one.  Ultimately, if you speak with a resident/professor/staff, you will benefit.  Some ways of benefiting are more obvious than others.   You will learn from your mistakes, and not repeat them, learn humility (always a good thing in a professional student, especially a medical student) and your patient will be better off.

3) Grades are not everything.  The more you worry about your grades, I guarantee you, the worse your grade is going to be.  Sure, worry about passing, but not more than that.  The only grade that matters in life is the respect you have for yourself and the respect that your clients and colleagues have for you.  Some people are just not going to like you.  All you have to worry about is working hard, trying your best and always being an advocate for those who can't speak, particularly, your patients.  The rule I've used is, I'd rather be thrown out of vet school with self-respect than to feel like I sacrificed my character to pass (and believe me, I've seen that).

4) People are going to have bad days.  The majority of the faculty and staff are great, and well-meaning.  Some people have bad days.  Some, more than others.  Some have things so stuck up their rear that only a tractor could remove it.  For the former, be understanding and remember you have bad days too.  For the latter, feel sorry for them, pray for them, or laugh; there's nothing you can do about it so move forward.

5) A smile burns 6 calories!  Every time you smile against your will, it burns 6 calories.  The more you smile, the more it becomes a habit, and eventually, when you smile, it rubs off on yourself and others.

6) Remember where you came from.  Remember when you were a child, or when you finally decided to be a vet.  Remember thinking that being a vet was the best thing in the whole world.  Remember when you thought, "All I have to do is get into vet school," and then it was, "All I have to do is get into clinics," and then it became, "All I have to do is graduate."  Sometimes, getting in touch with the reason you got here, will give you a smile, and sometimes it will help you remember how lucky you are, and how hard you worked.

Things I'm grateful for in this strange time

I was telling my husband I think this current time is probably the longest and most severe disruption Americans have had to their every day life since World War II.  September 11th was pretty disruptive and there have been plenty of other events that have seemed disruptive as well (The Cuban Missile Crisis, etc.).  Food shortages.  Massive school closures.  Yep, pretty sure I didn't think that was in my future a couple of months ago.  The fact that my fortieth birthday celebrations are cancelled- well, that's a First World problem.  We are experiencing restrictions and changes that are bringing us a little closer to third world.

Of course I cancelled our Costco membership a couple of months ago, so a house that is normally so well-supplied in toilet paper that my son used to make castles with it is actually rather short.  Some other items are not as well supplied as they could be.  My husband and I took account of our pantry and found we have a fair supply of peanut butter, flour and sugar.  The following list is not listed in order of importance.  I'll start the list off with-

Things I'm grateful for:

1) Family- this is an obvious one
2) Peanut Butter and Jelly (or without) Sandwiches- it's going to be fun for my son because he actually doesn't get to eat these at school
3) Pets- the dog and cat are actually loving our home-bound situation, I think they think it's the best thing ever and the dog has gotten more walks in 3 days then he typically gets in a month
4) A kid who loves to be outside.  It reminds me that "social distancing" does not need to be cabin fever.  Hiking, outdoor Stations of The Cross, walks and our own family basketball tournament make things fun
5) The fact that I got a new computer before this all started...
6) We live in a time of technology that even with social distancing my son can do video chat with his classmates and we can FaceTime with our family
7) People who are understanding and choose kind
8) People with a sense of humor- we all need a little bit of that right now.  It's a serious situation, but we can always look for beauty and humor to help carry the load
9) Online shopping!
10) Lent- a penitential time period reminds us that there is eventually an Easter.  Celebration will come.
11) Great scientists and doctors and nurses and medical technicians and everyone in the medical community who are working hard to keep us safe
12) Disney Plus bringing FROZEN out early.  That was a nice surprise.  And let's just be grateful for streaming services in total
13) Digital books through the library- this is great!
14) Extra time to spend with the family.  Let's face it.  We are normally going, going, going.  We are forced to sit down and be with each other and just be present.  That's a gift.
15) Readjusting expectations.  Sometimes, when a lot of things/opportunities get taken away, you realize just how much you have and that needs are different than wants.

Feel free to add to this list and I'll add more as the time goes.

New series of posts...

Once a week,  I'm going to do "flashbacks" to some writing I had done when I was in veterinary school.  Some of the stories I've totally forgotten, some of the names I've forgotten, but there are a couple of them that still crack me up.

I'm happy that my son has an appreciation of "history".  He is enthralled with any biography he can get his hands on and he loves visiting places that have historical significance.  My husband and I have been successful at making him a nerd, just like us.

Whether it's the history of the world, the history of our country or the history of our family, my son wants to know.  I know this is a magical time when his curiosity is limitless.  He already has a strong dislike for homework (I remember I did too, it's tough when homework seems like busy work and is too easy for him).  I've compromised with him that I won't make him review his spelling words with me as long as he continues to ace his tests.  Trying to get him to sit down and do his mathwork is about as hard as getting him to brush his teeth.  It must be done though.

I'm happy that he has a profound interest in history though.  One of his favorite questions at dinner time is, "Can we please listen to American Catholic History?"  It's a great podcast that we've found that talks about less well-known people
and events in American Catholic history.  He loves stories.  Hopefully one day, he will love all the stories that I write on this blog and that will preserve his memory.  Now... if only I could make his math homework a story....

Marian Consecration for Children

I went through the St Louis de Montfort True Consecration To Mary about 12 years ago.  My husband and I journeyed together through 33 Days to Morning Glory by Fr. Michael Gaitley at the beginning of marriage and have subsequently renewed our vows.

It is safe to say that the first time I consecrated myself to Jesus through Mary, I didn't have a full realization of what I was doing.  The books and meditations were very helpful, but it can be conceptually difficult to understand.  Each renewal and spiritual journey that is taken has led my husband and I closer to Jesus, through Mary.

I wouldn't have thought it was very likely to explain this devotion to a child, especially a 6 year old.  I received a book by Carrie Gress called, Marian Consecration For Children: Bringing Mary to Life in Young Hearts and Minds.

This is a wonderfully written book.  I will admit that the first time I tried to read this book to my son, we lasted about 1 day.  He just wasn't ready for it at age 5 and I didn't want to push him.  We gave it a second try this past fall and he was ready for it.  So were my husband and I.  This was a great spiritual exercise for our family to travel on together.

Each day has a story, sometimes a saint story or a story regarding great literature, then some discussion questions (we rotated through this, mom, dad and child so everyone participated) a "Did You Know" and then prayer to finish the day.  Each day was less than a 10 minute obligation and we amazingly were consistent with our reading.  Our consistency I think was a fruit of our engagement in the book.

I highly recommend this book and think it is just as beneficial for adults as for kids who want to continue to grow their relationship with Christ through our Holy Mother.





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Coronavirus

I'll make this fairly short and sweet.

The phrase I'm hearing from the veterinary and public health community is, "Be kind and wash your hands."

Don't go crazy.

Don't get masks- I guarantee you from personal experience when you have a mask on your face you are way more likely to touch your face and contaminate yourself.

Have supplies on hand, but don't go crazy.  Be kind.  Don't buy the grocery store out of toilet paper.  It's not necessary.

Avoid handshakes, give people their distance.  This is where we start.  I have also heard from some well-placed sources that the administration is actually handling this situation better than they handled Ebola.  So that's reassuring.

YAY!

I've been without a functioning computer for approximately 3 months (I found out at the beginning of December that my computer could no longer access the internet, and what else can you do with a computer).  Anyways, I'm hoping to get back to my Tuesday/Friday blogposts, so help hold me to it!

Even getting this computer has been fraught with challenges.  I was having back issues, then I got the flu, then I got a sinus infection and so once I was finally feeling healthy I told my husband it was time to get the computer.

We ordered it and it has apparently been out for delivery since Saturday morning.  I was actually able to get a friend to pick up my son from school so I could stay home and make sure I was present to sign for my computer.  Hopefully this means my writing will become more regular again.  I also would like to start a "series" with some items I wrote when I was in vet school.  Some of them still make me laugh 14 years later.