A funny Super Bowl Memory....

 I could talk about the time I worked Super Bowl Sunday Night in an animal hospital ER and how it was really busy right before the Super Bowl and then slowed down during it, and all the interesting characters I met. Instead, the Super Bowl memory that recently came to mind for me was from about 10 years ago.  I was living in Tucson, Arizona and my mom and Grandma had come to visit me.  My Grandma had been experiencing some hip pain and some other issues and it all culminated in a visit to the ER on Super Bowl Sunday night.

It had not been the night any of us had wanted, but it was what it was.  Fortunately, the women in my family somewhat defy stereotype and we all wanted to watch the Super Bowl, (I'm not sure who wanted to watch it for the game, the half time show or the ads, or all 3).

So there the three of us were, my Grandma admitted to the hospital in an unfamiliar state, watching the Super Bowl.  It was the strangest human ER experience I ever had.  I could not believe the care and attention my Grandma received.  Someone was popping into her room every few minutes to check on her, offer food, offer water, extra pillows, blankets.  Doctors and nurses were so attentive!  I don't remember who said it, or how we figured it out, but apparently my Grandma's room had become known around the ER by the staff as "the one that has the Super Bowl game on."  So.... if you ever find yourself in an ER on Super Bowl Sunday, make sure to turn the game on, even if you don't watch football.

Tips that are helping me survive parenting during the era of Coronavirus....

While I always suspected that Coronavirus and its restrictions would last longer than the 2 weeks people initially thought to "bend the curve."  I honestly didn't think it would be into 2021 (at least initially).  I know God is giving blessings through this time of grief and struggle.  I know there are silver linings.  I also know people who have lost people.  This time is hard for everyone and in different ways.  My husband and I certainly are not experts on parenting,  or regarding Coronavirus, but I thought I'd share some of the things we have done to try to maintain our sanity, and our kid's.

1) Virtual School- understand that other people if they have lower elementary school kids also think that virtual school could be a hilarious Saturday Night Live skit (if you are not living it).    Allow kids to be squirmy.  My son's teacher even suggested a stool (Kore) that is meant for kids who need to move constantly and it seems to work well for my kid.  He is allowed to squirm and move without being overly distracting.  

2) One silver lining- a lot more time with our famil
y and I mean a lot...  Which sometimes means we drive each other crazy.  Also a time for creativity, although sometimes I feel like I'm living in a Lego store or in the middle of a musical (both my husband and son will break into song randomly), I do appreciate some of these memories.   We do get sick of each other sometimes though, so I think it was around the summer when we discovered we had talked to each other all day and didn't really have anything more to talk about come dinner time, we started listening to audiobooks.  This has been enjoyable and we've been able to share books together.

3) Every time you wash your hands, say a Memorare for those suffering with COVID or struggling during this time.  I'm not sure which Catholic social media I read or saw this idea on, but I'm trying to do it more often and I certainly wash my hands a ton, especially when working.

4) Institute some new routines.  Even though my husband has converted me to the idea of menu planning, we hadn't really had a routine before.  Now I've tried to institute "Taco Tuesday,"  "Movie and Pizza Friday" and "Burgers on Sunday".  Anything that can help conserve a few of my neurons, is helpful and I think routines are good for kids.  In this time when my kid knows everything is up in the air, at least he knows he has some nights where he will have his favorite foods to look forward to.

5) What does neuroscience say?  It says that touch and presence are the most important for helping kids be resilient.  Study after study has shown that kids who've had trauma in their life are more resilient when they experience touch and presence.  Especially during the Spring when everything was new and very stressful, we instituted "family tickle time" at the end of the day.  My son loves to be tickled and we've found his "love language" if you know Gary Chapman's book is touch.  Whether it's tickling or allowing extra time in the day for "cuddle time" we've definitely been emphasizing giving our son this feeling of security.  Playing basketball with my son and making a conscious decision to be present has also helped.

6) Indoor trampoline.  Even though my house is already too cluttered with toys, the indoor trampoline my son got from his grandparents for his birthday has been helpful for everyone.  If the weather is too rough to get outside, it's great exercise and if my kid wants to binge watch "Wild Kratts" or "Lion Guard" I tell him it's fine as long as he is jumping on the trampoline wearing himself out.  To be honest, I've found if I too much anxiety or pent up energy I enjoy jumping my heart out.

7) Talking about feelings.  Sometimes in my job (no, let me be honest, a LOT of the time), I can feel like a psychotherapist, sometimes navigating awkward family situations or explaining that sometimes behavioral problems originate in the home environment.  I've had to bring that awareness home and talk with my son about feelings.  That it's ok to feel sad, anxious, angry, scared.  That it's ok to feel these things and at the same time feel, happy, excited and content.  There are things COVID has taken away from us, but there are also blessings that we have found.  This is certainly difficult for adults to figure out sometimes, so it's something we have to actively talk about.  I also created a punching pillow that we could punch when we got frustrated.  This apparently made an impression on our son as he shared it with his grandma a couple of days later.

8) Celebrate the Feast Days!  Yes, this year we have discovered Saints that we hadn't known about previously because really, whenever you can have an excuse to have a celebration, it's worth it.  While this has contributed to our waistlines, it's also helped us discover more about the pillars of our faith and those who have had heroic virtue before us.  Going along with this, whenever you feel downtrodden about the time we live in, read about St. Catherine of Sienna.  They had a pandemic in her time, as well as political unrest.  Sound familiar?

9) Give grace.  I'm pretty good about giving myself grace, what I've found I really need to work on is giving everyone else grace.  Whether it's my kid who's having a meltdown that I think he's too old to have, or an adult who's having a meltdown (yes, this happens a lot in my career), or it's unsolicited comments about all the ways I'm lacking (whether it's being able to keep all the balls I'm juggling in the air, or the extra pounds I've put on, or the extra alcohol I may have consumed), everyone needs grace.  This does not mean bad behavior is excused (especially for an adult), but it does mean that I need to keep my inner volcano from erupting and maybe bite my tongue, or breathe several long breaths before responding.

God Bless Our Teachers

 God Bless our teachers...

Our teachers have had to creatively deal with many new situations and experiences over the last year.  Sometimes, it’s a kid who forgot to mute and says, “Class never ends on time!  It’s always late”, or it may be kids shooting out emojis at prayer time that challenge teachers. Sometimes, there are awkward comments from kids that the teacher knows are not just overhead by other kids, but by every parent who is in the vicinity of the kid’s computer.   God bless our teachers and principals and school staff.

Sometimes, supervising virtual school I think of how it would be a really good Saturday Night Live skit, if I wasn’t the parent.  There are lessons I’ve been teaching at home about proper zoom contact that I won’t share and embarrass my kid, but just know, I’d love to share in laughter.  I’ve found myself doing and saying things I never could have imagined a year ago.

I’ve been witness to such patience and adaptability, it really gives me hope- for all of us.  Whether it’s technical issues, teaching kids proper use of emojis and backgrounds or ignoring what’s going on in the background, everyone has had to grow in patience.  Kids are experiencing stress from the stresses of their family, the environment and all the pieces of childhood that seem lost.  While adults are well equipped to know, “this too shall pass,” our kids don’t have the same history of experiences to feel with certainty that their “normal” life will return, eventually and maybe with some changes.  The gift of school, routine and relationships outside of the home help them cope.  These gifts also are gifts to the parents as they strive to bring some type of “normalcy” to the household.

There are zoom temper tantrums that it sounds like all of my friends with kids a similar age have to cope with.  For Pete’s sake, I have to deal with adults throwing Covid temper tantrums, so I can totally understand kids are even less equipped.

I’m amazed teachers keep a straight face when they see parents scurrying in the background to find papers, glue or to stop the cat from taking out a Christmas tree...  maybe I should be grateful that everyone kind of appears on a Brady Bunch screen and it’s a little harder to pick out the details.

God Bless Everyone, but this year I’m going to ask for extra blessings on teachers and our school staff...

Some points to think about...

 As people begin to get used to COVID precautions and things opening up, our clients have been getting less patient and understanding.  I am finding myself spending more time on the phone listening to people's frustrations of the current situation (some of which involve that I'm running late, which happens when I have to spend more time listening to frustrations on the phone), but I digress.

The nature of a veterinarian and what we do is different from the grocery store clerk, a school teacher or even a human doctor.

Animals don't talk, they can't communicate.  This seems basic, but is something that clients don't always realize have repercussions.  If I'm examining your pet,  I need to touch your pet all over.  As much as I would prefer to wear gloves, it is difficult for me to do a full and thorough exam with gloves.  If I'm looking for a tiny bump or change in texture, it's hard to feel through gloves.  In order to restrain an animal, even if it's friendly and just wants to jump and say Hi, someone has to hold that animal very close to their body.  Sometimes, pet owners instinctively want to jump in and comfort their animal.  We often find ourselves as veterinarians and technicians getting way more in each other's personal space than we would allow anyone else.  Those are risks we have to deal with.  As coworkers, we are a team and we work to protect each other.

Risks we shouldn't have to deal with are the large number of people who don't wear masks appropriately.  Yes, a mask is supposed to cover your nose.  No, masks with respirators don't do anything to protect me from you.  No, please don't remove your mask every time you talk to me.  My limited exposure to clients has taught me that I really can't take chances.  People when they are emotional, either about their pet or life in general, don't think clearly.  They often don't make good choices.  I am responsible for making good choices.  The moment I have to put my family and my health at greater risk because of others choices is the moment I need to change my behavior and decisions.

No, I don't think masks should be mandated and I'm not getting into politics.  I'm just asking that if I'm working with you or your pet, you respect the fact that I do not want to get within 6 feet of you.  I'm asking that we respect each other.  While we all have different comfort zones, we need to respect each other.  So while I can't mandate people to wear masks appropriately and I can't mandate people to make good choices, I can say, "I do not want you in a small, enclosed room with an unpredictable animal with you."  While that might seem rude, it is unfortunately the people who don't make good choices who dictate the choices the rest of us have to make.

So please, I know it's hard to be separated from your fur-babies and waiting in the car is a pain, but consider that we all have families too and we are just trying to do our best.

Lily Lolek: Future Saint

 Lily Lolek: Future Saint

 

I was excited to receive Katie Warner’s new book, Lily Lolek Future Saint.  The illustrations are playful and well-done and the storyline is even better.

 

It tells of a girl named Lily who “there was nothing that she wanted more than to love with her might and to burst with God’s joy…”. It then is a whimsical introduction to the charisms of the saints, describing their virtues that Lily wants to emulate.  She becomes disheartened when she is told she won’t be exactly like these saints.  A priest comes to dinner and shares with her that God loves her and doesn’t want people to be exactly like a previous saint, but like the saint God made her to be.  It talks about building a relationship with God and following the examples of the saints, not copying them.  A wonderful message!

 

Overall, my son and I enjoyed this book.  He was familiar with the saints mentioned, but I think this book would be a great way to also introduce children to new saints and do further investigation.  The message of the book overall was wonderful to share with my son.  I think we will enjoy this book in years to come.

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Vet School Series: Critical Care Humor

This is from my vet school series- bear in mind that I was a sleep-deprived student when you look at the grammar and sentence structure...

I am on my Emergency and Critical Care rotation, that is why I am posting at 3:44 in the morning.  

After a long day of death, tears, hard work, throw in some anal glands, vomiting and diarrhea and exposure to X-rays, some dog wrestling, Chihuahua lunging, etc.. I am exhausted.

  Let's just say here, we start our days with Ibuprofen.  I have mysterious bruises on my arms that I don't know where I acquired them from.   I think I've developed dyslexia and I might have a concussion from body-slamming a Great Dane (when I body slam, it does nothing except stop the dog).  Am I complaining?  No, I'm a vet student,  and in some sick and twisted way, I actually enjoy this!

The people I'm working with are fun.  Sure there's stress when you have a cat on dialysis, a dog that ate chocolate, one that ate oxycontin, a septic abdomen and by the way there's a woman who is paging you every 60 minutes to ask annoying questions that you legally aren't allowed to answer.  We actually all can recognize her by her voice.  Unfortunately, we don't have laws like 911 operators do and we have to drop whatever we are doing to answer the phone.  But then there's those bonding moments, where you don't care that you have blood or other substances you don't want me to elaborate on, on your shoes, face shirt.   You just see that burrito that the angel from heaven, your beloved classmate, brings to you.  Then, as you're presenting an emergency case to the lead doctor, throughout the night he is trying different aerodynamic engineering designs to see if he can get the air conditioner to nail someone across the room.  There's laughter, tears, there is blood and there is guts, but what makes up for all the sad news and death we deal with is when Fifi goes home and the owners want to give you a hug, or when that cat who has been looking like death warmed over has the will to live!  (This typically means they try biting).  There's nothing like a cat who decides they feel good enough to be pissed off.  By the way, I'm not sure what day of the week it is and my body's schedule is all screwed up.  S
o if there are any spelling errors or things don't make sense, I apologize.

Election craziness

This is a post I wrote before the election in 2016.  It still seems to be relevant today....

I vacillate between worry about the election and a complete, "I'm done" with it all.  There's uncertainty in everyone's future and if you listened to the news and political people you would think whoever gets elected in 11 days the world will possibly end.

I work in an area where many people have opposing viewpoints and I work with people who either agree or agree to disagree.  This is a good thing.  It reminds me the world will go on and most people are just as frustrated as I am by our choices and the hostility in our current political climate.  I also am reminded everyday of the dogs and cats I work with who have no clue as to the partisanship around them and just display loyalty and friendship.  I'm not suggesting we should send our politicians to the dogs, but it restores my memory of what life is like with simplicity and without partisanship.

This election does matter.  It's important that everyone votes and understands the consequences, but should you be getting anxious and worried consider doing the following:

1. Know that as faith-filled people, "Jesus I Trust In You," can lower your blood pressure and remind you, render on to Caesar what is Caesar's and to God what is God's.  Think what you will about either political leader, but either way, we aren't living in the time of Nero's Circus and the Roman Emperors.
2. Read a little about the Founding Fathers.  They may not have had e-mail, but their scandals and drama was every bit as scary as ours.  Even Alexander Hamilton had a rather racy sex scandal.  At least we don't do duels anymore.  This was also a time when we were still known as "The American Experiment".  At least with over 200 years worth of corrupt politicians, we know that our democracy has been through it before.
3. Consider turning off the TV and going for a walk.  Sometimes it's good to get outside, smell the fresh air, watch the autumn leaves and think of America as a simple idyllic land.
4. Drink some wine, or hot chocolate, or whatever warm (or cold) drink that makes you happy and be grateful for the little things.
5. Think about how we are blessed.  Sure, we have politicians who we wouldn't want our kids to look up to.  I'm grateful that I don't have to explain everything in the news to my son.  With liars and language that even my thirty-something self doesn't like it can get rough.  I listened to Francesca Battistelli's song, "This Is The Stuff" on my way home tonight.  If you haven't listened to it, give it a try.  It talks about losing your keys and all sorts of other stuff that is a regular occurrence in many people's busy lives.  It talks about, "this is the stuff that gets under my skin".  It also ultimately comes out with the message, "when I'm in the middle of this little mess it reminds me exactly how much I'm blessed."  Yes, no one wants to deal with all the politics right now.  November 8th (or November 9th if you are the other party, you know republicans and democrats vote on different days, right?  Just kidding...) can't come soon enough.  But we all need to remember, we are blessed to live in a country where we can vote, where both sexes and all ideologies vote and no matter all the dirty tricks and other tactics, we actually do live in a democracy.  Take advantage of it.  Vote and most importantly pray.  Pray for unity and peace.