Monday, December 2, 2019

Purple Light and unsolicited advice

The other day as I was leaving the gym, a boy about 3 years old came running by me with his mother hollering behind him.  His mom was pushing a stroller with a baby and had no hope of keeping up.  It didn't look like the boy was being disobedient, just an energetic 3 year old.

I slowed down and turned to him and said, "it sounds like your mommy wants you to come back."  The mother was rushing to get him and thanked me for keeping him from running into the busy parking lot.  I turned to her and said, "you know what really used to work for my son?"  I could see the eyes rolling in the back of her head, like "great, I have to hear some unwanted advice."  I knew if my husband was there he would chide me for giving unwanted advice, but I continued.  "We did red light, green light," her eyes told me she had tried that before, and there may have even been a sigh.  "But we had a purple light."  She was now intrigued.  "Purple light means, come back and give me a hug."  She smiled.  She liked that, she said.  I told her, "It's hard for kids and adults to get a red light, but a purple light is fun."  She told her son.  He started to run and then she said, "Purple light" and he ran back to her and gave her a hug.

A little later as I walked back to my car, I heard the little boy call "Purple light" on his own and run back to his mom and give her a hug.  She gave me a big thank you and said, "Wow, thanks so much, this is life-changing."  Unsolicited advice is not always bad...  When you feel the urge to share something helpful, remember if given in a non-judgemental and sympathetic way, it could just be "life-changing"

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